Emily Ratajkowksi has had a lot to say on TikTok. In the last few weeks, we’ve learned the following: She’s got a thing for ugly men (who doesn’t?), is afraid of Shia LaBeouf’s redemption tour (who isn’t?), and prefers her bagels burnt (can’t relate to this one).
Whether you agree or disagree with the newly-single model’s recent talk on TikTok, Ratajkowski just made some salient points on the patriarchy in one of her latest posts. Whilst dueting an account known as @thegardeningtheologian, she responds to the aforementioned’s point that “patriarchy does not give space for the existence of love” and expounds upon intersectional feminist author bell hook’s theory that within such framework, the notion of heterosexual men “getting” women thrives.
“I love this video, because she’s making the point that bell hooks made, which is that under a patriarchy, there’s this premise of like men ‘getting women,’ like ‘getting them,’ ‘pulling them,’ like they’re something to possess.” One would be willing to wager that arguably one of the most conventionally attractive women alive has a lifetime of experience being made to feel “gotten,” “pulled” and the like. She then goes on to reference her recent split from her husband of four years, Sebastian Bear-McClard, and how she’s noted a particular pattern within cishet relationships.
“As a recently single person who is thinking about dating and stuff, I’ve really seen that with my friends and with the conversations kind of around it. It’s like, ‘Who’s going to get her?’ rather than this, is a reciprocal, mutual relationship where two people could potentially foster love?”
Ultimately, a resigned-looking Ratajkowski concludes: “So, yeah. That’s why we don’t have a lot of love in cis-hetero relationships.”
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The timing of Ratajkowski’s proclamation is enough to raise an eyebrow or two, given she was recently linked to Brad Pitt, and it’s been less than two months since she all but confirmed rumors of her ex’s infidelity by liking a tweet that read, “I can’t believe that little bitch cheated on emrata.”
Regardless of who she may or may not be seeing in the wake of her separation, the woman is not wrong—especially when the bulk of the discourse surrounding her split often elicits some variation of, “I can’t believe that guy got her in the first place.” While I understand the temptation to rest on such ideals, it’s bleak enough for the unattached cishets as it is. I can’t speak for everyone, but most of us would prefer not to be “pulled” anywhere. Well, maybe toward an all-expenses-paid vacation without the person bankrolling it, but that’s neither here nor there!
Frankly, Ratajkowski’s divulgence is yet another stark reminder that navigating cishet relationships sucks for all of us—even the objectively hottest among us. Heartening!